When parents split up or go to court

Divorce, custody fights, and protection orders can make you feel stuck in the middle. You didn’t cause this.

Things to know

You’re not responsible for your parents’ relationship, for picking a side, or for passing messages between them.
Courts are supposed to decide based on what’s best for the kids. Some courts appoint someone, like a guardian ad litem, to find out what you need and tell the judge.
If there’s a restraining or protection order, follow it, even if you miss someone. Breaking it can get the adult in serious trouble.
You can tell a counselor, a guardian ad litem, or a lawyer how you feel. It’s okay to say “I don’t want to choose.”

Keep your own routines: school, friends, sleep, things you enjoy.
If a parent badmouths the other one to you, you can say “Please don’t talk to me about that.”
If either home isn’t safe, tell a trusted adult or call Childhelp.